In one of the modules, our lecturer asked us to write an essay about “ourselves”. Who we are? Our past? Our aims? And where we think, we would be in future? The topic seemed very simple, silly and very easy to us. We all picked out pens to write our story, but stared at the paper for 10 minutes and still could not write a word on ourselves. How stupid and weird is it that we could not write a single sentence on us. When asked to write about others we can write thousands of words but when it comes to ourselves, we need such a long time. Why? Is it because we never cared about us? Or is it because we left other people to judge who we are??
By the end of the class we were able to scribble some of our “thoughts” on ourselves. We all opened our sentences, with our names and then saying that people think, I am outstanding, confident, beautiful, creative …blah blah blah but none of us said, who WE think we are? We judged ourselves on what people said to us.
While talking about our past, we all talked about our culture, customs, family. It was nice to hear and observe that we still believe in family values. But it was a shock how people still believe in imposing cultures and its values in people without thinking about their personal desires. Someone once said, we are all born free but are chained afterwards. I highly believe in this statement because no matter how educated we think we are, there is always something or the other that draws back our steps. Is it us who created that chains or is it the circumstances that compels us to be in such circle?
When I was at school, (millions of years back!) my teacher asked us to write an essay about our aims in life. I still remember, there were 40 students in class and all of us had a same aim in life; “Doctor”. We got very good grades for writing such an aspiring essay however, it is funny that out of 40, only two of the students are studying medical science. Although we were different people, we had similar aims because that is what we were shown by other people. Some of my friends believed in this aim for a long time as it was imposed on them, it took them a lot of time and effort to change this “so called aim” into something they wanted to do in life.
No matter how much we think, we are independent and sensible enough to make a decision on our personal life or ourselves? We often seek for other people to tell us what to do? It is not wrong to seek help but it is wrong not to believe in us. It is wrong not to recognise own potentiality and capabilities.
I hope we start thinking about who we think we are and not on the base of others judgements. I hope next time, when any of us are asked to write about ourselves, we would not hesitate and write our own thoughts not what other says…Good luck!
Monday, 19 April 2010
Monday, 12 April 2010
What do we think????
There's only one corner of the universe you can be certain of improving, and that's your own self.- Aldous Huxley.
This is the day and age, where people are gasping for success and would do anything to achieve it. Everybody claims to know everything, and to be confident and outstanding. It is a fact that some of the successful people in today’s world are exceptions, they have every ingredient of success, however, Is it necessary that if we are confident, we should have high self esteem as well? What is self esteem, why is it so important in this day and age??
Self esteem is a crucial constituent for success in life. Confidence is part of self esteem but it is not necessary that being confident means having high self esteem. People like celebrities and TV personalities might have confidence on stage but when they are out of their professional world they can have the lowest self esteem of all. So, what is self esteem? - Self esteem comes from latin word “to estimate” therefore, to estimate yourself or an opinion on yourself is what self esteem is all about. (Cambridge University counselling service)
Now let us see, how can we evaluate ourselves or where do we stand or how strong is our self esteem? Lets ask following questions to ourselves:
1) Do I like myself?
2) Do I think I am good human being?
3) Do I deserve happiness?
4) Do I deserve love?
If we answer “yes” to all these questions, without hesitation, then yes we have high self esteem and vice versa. It is us who we should believe, it is our state of mind and our belief that the people see in us. If we want love and respect in life, we should love and respect ourselves first. Before, we introduce ourselves to other’s we should recognise ourselves.
Sometimes, acknowledging ourselves can be taken in a negative way. People might name us boastful, arrogant or conceited. It is obvious that with all these nomenclature, our self esteem would get a quake. Emotions, state of mind, surroundings, relations… affects one’s life in a big way. However, if we change the negative criticism into a positive ego, it will help to boost our confidence, and success would kiss our destiny. The more success we get in life, the more, people estimate our ability, which sometimes might lead to failure as we might not live up to the expectations. We constantly judge, evaluate and compare ourselves with others. It is good to compare ourselves, as it boosts our confidence, however, sometimes the balls can roll in other side of the court.
Everything can be changed in this world, apart from the word “change” itself. People tend to change their lifestyles and believe to get adjusted in the society or this fast moving world. In this pressure, they forget the beauty of life, which can lead to low self esteem as, if we don’t enjoy ourselves, we won’t be able to keep others entertained. We should believe that we are able and can achieve things that we aimed for; it indeed does help people to change their perceptions towards us.
Therefore, it is all about loving, respecting, pampering and recognising ourselves. If we do not respect and love ourselves, no one would, if we do not think we are beautiful, nobody would, if we do not think we are capable, no one would, if we do not think we can, nobody would….So what do you think???
This is the day and age, where people are gasping for success and would do anything to achieve it. Everybody claims to know everything, and to be confident and outstanding. It is a fact that some of the successful people in today’s world are exceptions, they have every ingredient of success, however, Is it necessary that if we are confident, we should have high self esteem as well? What is self esteem, why is it so important in this day and age??
Self esteem is a crucial constituent for success in life. Confidence is part of self esteem but it is not necessary that being confident means having high self esteem. People like celebrities and TV personalities might have confidence on stage but when they are out of their professional world they can have the lowest self esteem of all. So, what is self esteem? - Self esteem comes from latin word “to estimate” therefore, to estimate yourself or an opinion on yourself is what self esteem is all about. (Cambridge University counselling service)
Now let us see, how can we evaluate ourselves or where do we stand or how strong is our self esteem? Lets ask following questions to ourselves:
1) Do I like myself?
2) Do I think I am good human being?
3) Do I deserve happiness?
4) Do I deserve love?
If we answer “yes” to all these questions, without hesitation, then yes we have high self esteem and vice versa. It is us who we should believe, it is our state of mind and our belief that the people see in us. If we want love and respect in life, we should love and respect ourselves first. Before, we introduce ourselves to other’s we should recognise ourselves.
Sometimes, acknowledging ourselves can be taken in a negative way. People might name us boastful, arrogant or conceited. It is obvious that with all these nomenclature, our self esteem would get a quake. Emotions, state of mind, surroundings, relations… affects one’s life in a big way. However, if we change the negative criticism into a positive ego, it will help to boost our confidence, and success would kiss our destiny. The more success we get in life, the more, people estimate our ability, which sometimes might lead to failure as we might not live up to the expectations. We constantly judge, evaluate and compare ourselves with others. It is good to compare ourselves, as it boosts our confidence, however, sometimes the balls can roll in other side of the court.
Everything can be changed in this world, apart from the word “change” itself. People tend to change their lifestyles and believe to get adjusted in the society or this fast moving world. In this pressure, they forget the beauty of life, which can lead to low self esteem as, if we don’t enjoy ourselves, we won’t be able to keep others entertained. We should believe that we are able and can achieve things that we aimed for; it indeed does help people to change their perceptions towards us.
Therefore, it is all about loving, respecting, pampering and recognising ourselves. If we do not respect and love ourselves, no one would, if we do not think we are beautiful, nobody would, if we do not think we are capable, no one would, if we do not think we can, nobody would….So what do you think???
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